I’m not sure how to even begin this post but girls I’m back and I come here to stay! I have taken a very long – not so planned – vacation from blogging and even from social media. My life has changed so much over the past year! But why did I stopped blogging and where have I been?
An emotional rollercoaster
It has actually been a year since I published my last post. So why did I stopped blogging all of a sudden? When I posted my last blogpost, I only planned to put my blog on a short pause because of exams. Things turned out completely different…
I hadn’t really been feeling like myself for a long time. That really started affecting my motivation and inspiration to blog. I tend to write personal blogposts so it just kept getting harder and harder to write. But it took a long time for me to acknowledge where this feeling came from. Turned out I wasn’t happy with my relationship for quite some time. Obviously, I am not going into details about it. The last couple of months before I’d quit blogging were an emotional rollercoaster for me and I didn’t shared it with anybody. I just did not wanted to deal with it. I shoved all my feelings under the carpet and put on a happy face and hoped things would become better. Bad form. Eventually, I kept feeling worse and I knew I had to face my feelings: I ended my relationship. From that moment it immediately felt like I could breathe again. It was time to work on myself, for myself, by myself.
Crazy in love
Fast forwarding a little bit – beginning of summer ’16 – I found myself happier than I have ever been! I was finally feeling like ‘me’ again, with not a care in the world. As tough as the beginning of 2016 was, how beautiful it got after I got to know Romke. I had met Romke when I started working at Aegon in 2015. We talked to each other every now and then but we had always left it at that. Until we started to getting to know each other and we found ourselves crazy in love – and we still are! Things went very quickly for us and by the end of the summer I moved across the county to move in with him. I now live in a very small village, but I enjoy life a lot here. Who would have thought? Moving from the city I grew up in, to a big student city, to the United States, back to the city I grew up in and now in a place where there isn’t even a supermarket. People make fun of me all the damn time, and I get that! 😉 But I love the tranquility this village has. To me, the most important thing is that it doesn’t matter where I live, the people that surround me make me happy.
Many, many, many times I thought about starting to blog again. But I was also enjoying my time off too. I loved not having the feeling that I’d always had to be on top of everything. You know how that goes when you’re in a new relationship, you want to spend time together 24/7. So we did. The one thing that was holding me back from blogging was that I remembered spending most of my free time behind my laptop. But this time around, I also want to spend my time off with Romke. But being the perfectionist that I am, I want to be satisfied with the work that I deliver and the progress that I make blogging. It’s very important to me to find a balance between these things. So I started writing a plan on how I am going to do that. The last month I spend some time on reading articles about planning, prioritizing and on how to cope with procrastination (which I’m the best at!). I also outlined for myself what I’m going to blog about, and what not. Nevertheless, any tips on blogging are always welcome! 😉
I’m very excited to be back at it, but I do genuinely think that it was a much needed break for me. I have felt like a quitter so many times for pausing my blog but I couldn’t find the inspiration. I have been doubting myself also too much… Can I do it? What should my first post be? What should I tell, what not? What would people think about that I’d quit? But the past year I kept thinking about blogging it every single day and how much I missed it and how much I missed you guys! So here I am girls, with a fresh start! I hope you’re just as excited as me that I’m back! 🙂
Hugs ‘n kisses!